The causes of modern social problems, from divorce to homelessness and obesity, are often thought to be based in areas such as poverty, stress or unhappiness. You may think your friend is wrong or making a mistake but you must respect his or her right to choose their own path and their own learning. Friendship is an opportunity to love, to learn about yourself, to mature as a human being, and to open up to the full experience of life. One person cannot be everything to you even though you may have one ‘best’ friend. There has to be enough freedom and independence in your relationship for the growth that is a normal part of human development. The rest of the weekend was spent doing girly, mother-and-daughter stuff like shopping, manicures, movies and just spending time together. But researchers suggest we are overlooking something crucial: friendship.
I'm pleased that you liked the essay.Get the help you need from a therapist near you–a FREE service from Psychology Today.The next step is to encourage my patients to begin to make new friends and the expected response is “how?” I tell them that they have to put themselves out there and that no one is going to come knocking at their door. The Value of Friendship We all need friends apart from and in addition to our intimate relationships. You might be afraid of being weak, vulnerable, or dependent. It didn’t occur to me that I had virtually no friends. “Be slow to fall into friendship; but when thou art … I went up early Saturday morning and left after dinner Sunday evening. I feel important when the people I’m close to in my life need to lean on me, and it’s a pretty great feeling when you’ve made a friend’s day better even slightly. Many of my best friends are people I've met online through writing (and my brother met his wife over the Internet). Good friends may help your life last longer, too. My friends have taught me that a true friendship requires both giving and receiving. To live and to love are inseparable from each other. You have to call them, and make the effort to be with them. It was almost eleven years after my graduation party and not one professional was in attendance.Excellent essay, Gerri. I may not always follow their advice but I truly value it. He also worked on Saturday — he owned a retail business ─ and often spent Sundays with his wife and children. The eight key qualities you must demonstrate are: priority, self-disclosure, touch, affection, loyalty, independence, acceptance, and willingness to change. I know it’s given carefully and with love.Good friends are vitally important to your mental health and to the quality of your life. Give as much as you can and be gracious in accepting their giving to you.Developing true friendships may sound like a lot of work but the joy of experiencing life with an open heart and sharing it with a true friend are worth it. You must have the courage to walk through your fear of emotional intimacy and let another person know who you really are on the inside. Although, it’s rare to find a friendship that is long lasting, life changing, and true, that doesn’t mean that it won’t be meaningful or genuine. You have to be willing to stand by your friend through thick and thin. She was the strong one, not me. This is where effort comes in. Think about this: if you don’t let your friends give to you, it’s a one-way relationship and the deepest part of you is not really in it. Friendships deepen over time and shared experiences, and you’ll share different experiences and different aspects of yourself with different friends. To live and to love are inseparable from each other. You can find ways to keep the relationship alive and strong if you are willing to be creative.Here is what you have to do if you want to turn an aquaintance into a friend and a friend into a close friend. Values of a Friend Be a friend to get a friend. Besides, you will live longer and be in good company along the way.Be open and accepting of the choices that your friends make. Another incredible impact of friendship is the meaning your friends give you. You can be honest when you’re asked for your opinion but you don’t have to be critical or judgmental. About 20 of my closest friends and family came to help me celebrate and I was overwhelmed by the love in that room. Be flexible enough to adapt to different ways of relating to each other.
Some days we feel lonely. True friendship requires time and sincere effort.
When you find it, hold onto it, nurture it, and value it because a true friendship can bring immense joy throughout all of life’s stages. Posted Mar 23, 2013 If it is reading, perhaps a book club and/or going to a reading at a bookstore.Before my mother passed away eleven years ago, I spent every weekend with her up at her home in Connecticut, about a half-an-hour from my apartment in a suburb of New York. And then I would think about what she was going through, and I knew that I would do anything for her. This isn’t always easy. Friends can lean on each other and there will be times when one may lean more than the other will. So we throw... Be there during the trials as well as the joys. A recent study followed nearly 1,500 older people for 10 years. You may be one of those people who are good at giving to others but are reluctant to let your friends love and care for you.
Several years later, she was there for me when I was going through a difficult time in my life.Friendships can and do change.
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